Something in your life is harmful and you know it. Today it is time to let go.
It going to hurt but this relief is going to create something new & beautiful in your life. The sooner you can let it go. The sooner you going to be heal.
It going to hurt but this relief is going to create something new & beautiful in your life. The sooner you can let it go. The sooner you going to be heal.
Here are some steps to help you forget about something that no longer grows you :
1. Create a new world.
This is especially important if your world has collided with his, meaning that mutual friends who have seen him in the last week feel the need to tell you about it. Create your own safe world–full of new friends who wouldn’t recognize him in a crowd and don’t know how to spell his name–where he is not allowed to drop by for a figurative or literal surprise visit. Take this opportunity to try something new – scuba diving lessons, an art class, a book club, a blog – to program your mind and body to expect a fresh beginning – without him
2. Go through it, not around it.
I realize the most difficult task for a person with a broken heart is to stand still and feel the crack. But that is exactly what he or she must do. Because no shortcut is without its share of obstructions. Here’s a simple fact: You have to grieve in order to move on. During the few months of my depression, my therapist repeated almost every visit: “Go through it. Not around it.” Because if I went around some of the issues that were tearing me apart inside, then I would bump into them somewhere down the line, just like being caught in the center of a traffic circle. By going through the intense pain, I eventually surfaced as a stronger person ready to tackle problems head on. Soon the pain lost its stronghold over me.
3. Stand on your own
One of the most liberating thoughts I repeat to myself when I’m immersed in grief and sadness is this: “I don’t need anyone or anything to make me happy.” That job is all my own, with a little help from God. When I’m experiencing the intense pangs of grief, it is so difficult to trust that I can be whole without that person in my life. But I have learned over and over again that I can. I really can. It is my job to fill the emptiness, and I can do it … creatively, and with the help of my higher power.
4. Keep Yourself Busy
Know exactly what you good at and things that can help forget about the pain. Well as I said to myself during the past months "reading, listening to good music and writing some articles are usually the things that keep me busy. I started doing them and they helped me. I’m ready to tackle my next challenge: move on from this sadness and try to be a productive individual in this world. If you can’t list your strengths, start a self-esteem . Be strong Within.
5. Help someone else.
When I’m in pain, the only guaranteed antidote to my suffering is to box up all of my feelings, sort them, and then try to find a use for them. When you turn your attention to another person–especially someone who is struggling with the same kind of pain–you forget about yourself for a split moment. And let’s face it, on some days, that feels like a miracle.
6. Laugh & Cry
Laughter heals on many levels and so does crying. You think it’s just a coincidence that you always feel better after a good cry? Nope, there are many physiological reasons that contribute to the healing power. So go grab a box of Kleenex and cry your afternoon away & Don't forget to laugh out loud when happy.
7. Know Your Strength & Weakness
You need to know which activities will make you feel good, and which ones will tear you up . You won’t really know which activity belongs on which list until you start trying things, but I suspect that things like checking out his Profile on Whatsapp and seeing that hes new gorgeous new girlfriend is his Display Picture will eventually wont make you feel good, so put that on the “don’t attempt” list. On the “feels peachy” list might be found : deleting all of his e-mails and voicemail, Go out there to the beach or have a coffee with a new friend who doesn’t know him from Adam (to ensure his name won’t pop up).
8. Work it out.
Working out your grief quite literally – by running, swimming, walking, or kick-boxing – is going to give you immediate relief. On a physiological level–because exercise increases the activity of serotonin and/or norepinehrine and stimulates brain chemicals that foster growth of nerve cells–but also on an emotional level, because you are taking charge and becoming the master of your mind and body. Plus you can visualize the fellow who is responsible for your pain and you can kick him in the face. Now doesn’t that feel good.
9. Find hope.
There’s a powerful quote in the movie The Tale of Despereaux that I’ve been thinking about ever since I heard it: “There is one emotion that is stronger than fear, and that is forgiveness. But forgiveness requires hope: believing that a better place exists, that the aching emptiness experienced in your every activity won’t be with you forever, that one day you’ll be excited to make coffee in the morning or go to a movie with friends. Hope is believing that the sadness can evaporate, that if you try like hell to move on with your life, your smile won’t always be forced. Therefore in order to forgive and to move past fear, you need to find hope.
10. Fall in Love deeply Again
Once our hearts are bruised and burned from a relationship that ended, we have two options: we can close off pieces of our heart so that one day no one will be able to get inside. Or we can love again. Deeply, just as intensely as we did before. Henri Nouwen urges to love again because the heart only expands with the love we are able to pour forth. He writes:
The more you have loved and have allowed yourself to suffer because of your love, the more you will be able to let your heart grow wider and deeper. When your love is truly giving and receiving, those whom you love will not leave your heart even when they depart from you. The pain of rejection, absence, and death can become fruitful. Yes, as you love deeply the ground of your heart will be broken more and more, but you will rejoice in the abundance of the fruit it will bear.
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